SUNDAY NEWS
April 12, 2009
HAPPY EASTER everybody! Vayden wore the dress with the pink and white tulips all over it that Great Grandma Miller gave to church today. In her Easter basket Vayden got a bunny and couple of videos. She hasn’t watched them yet, but go 30 minutes worth of entertainment just playing with the crinkly plastic they were packaged in. Christian enjoyed hunting eggs that looked like footballs, baseballs, soccer balls and basketballs filled with one of his favorite things in the world . . . . $$ Money $$!
This week we got to experience the wonderful bureaucracy of the U.S. Government. Both Christian and Vayden need passports for upcoming vacation plans. We blocked out a 3 hour time slot in our afternoon and pulled Christian out of school to go to the Superior Court. First we went and got passport pictures. Something about the passport picture of a 6 month old is just funny. In Vayden’s passport photo she has her mouth handing wide open with a yellow bow in her hair.
After her passport photo shoot Vayden fell asleep on the ride to the Superior Court. When we attempted to go through security, the security guard wanted Karl to take the sleeping baby out of her car seat. This was the same court, and same security guard that made Karl take Vayden out of her car seat when she was covered in poop a few weeks back. This prompted Karl to enter into an adversarial dialogue with the security guard which Christian enjoyed and Lori didn’t. After standing in line for some time, we were told that the only accepted method of payment for one of the two applicable fees was by way of a money order. The court would accept payment of the $25 fee by cash or debit card, but the $60 dollar fee needed to be in the form of a money order. So we left the court to obtain a money order. Mission accomplished the family returned to the Superior Court again. This time Karl promised to keep his mouth shut when encountering his old fascist anal retentive friend the security guard.
After considerable additional time standing in line, the hour became so late that Karl was going to miss a late afternoon appointment with some new clients at his office. Even though Karl had previously provided his identification and consent for Vayden to obtain a passport the first time we went through the line, the policy required him to be physically present the second time. Apparently there must be an abundance of vacillating fathers who decide to leave their driver’s licenses even though they have changed their minds inside of an hour’s time about granting permission for their 6 month old babies to obtain a passport. So after pulling Christian out of school and investing several hours, we ended up with a failed attempt on day one of the quest for passports for Christian and Vayden.
Upon reflection, this whole tedious story may not in fact be interesting to others, but to make a long story short, the passports were eventually obtained that week after having to pull Christian out of school again and after investing some considerable additional time waiting in line in the hall of a very warm local post office.
Very Vayden
Living with Vayden is like living with this crazy little happy cartoon character. She is a riot. She is all smiles, laughs and all kinds of other crazy sounds. She has come to the conclusion that she can impose her will. For instance, Vayden has decided that she is a fruit girl and wants nothing to do with vegetables anymore. Try to give her vegetables and she will move her head side to side a light speed or put her face down into her tray so you can’t access her mouth. She is now mobile using a series of rolls and scooting. So far she only scoots backward. Lori is trying to wean her which goes better some days than others.
Completely Christian
Christian was excited to go on a camping trip this week. Christian and Karl tried out the big new family tent that has 4 separate rooms. They had lots fun hiking, chopping wood, cooking on the camp fire, and shooting their pellet guns. Christian is actually a very good shot and a very accomplished grasshopper hunter. Christian is a great little outdoorsman. He does need to work on the acceptance of camp food however. When the wind blew a little white ash on to the hot dog Christian was roasting over the fire, Christian asked Karl how to get the ash off his hot dog. Christian looked a little perplexed when Karl’s suggestion was to lick it off.
We have had requests for the inclusion of more Christian conversations, so the camping trip produced one worthy of inclusion. After Karl had cooked some dang good scrambled eggs over the fire, (no black stuff, just beautiful fluffy yellow eggs) Christian asked if he could have a second helping. Karl told him to go ahead. Well when the temperature is about 30 degrees in the morning it doesn’t take long for eggs to get a little cold. Christian took a bite of his second helping of eggs and the conversation went like this:
Christian: Dad, did you know that these eggs are cold?
Karl: That doesn’t surprise me.
Christian: Well what should I do?
Karl: Ahh . . . eat them.
Christian: But they are kind of cold.
Karl: Oh well then maybe you can call the waitress and have here take them back and get you some hot ones?
Christian: What?
Karl: I’m kidding, why don’t you pop them in the microwave.
Christian: We have a microwave?
Karl: Do we look like we have a microwave?
Christian: No.
Karl: Just eat them.
Christian: You want me to eat them cold.
Karl: Yeah, that is what camping is all about; the food is either too done or not done enough.
Christian: Why?
Karl: That is just the way it is.
Christian: But how come?
Karl: Well, the fire is missing a control knob.
Christian: It is?
Karl: Christian, I mean we can’t control the temperature of the fire like we can a stove.
Christian: But Dad, you expect me to eat these cold.
Karl: Why not? It won’t hurt you.
Christian: Can’t I just eat something else?
Karl: Like what? That pine tree?
Christian: Can I just throw them in the fire?
Karl: No because I think you should eat those and you will probably burn yourself getting them out of the fire once they are warm enough for you.
Christian: So I have to eat these.
Karl: Yep.
Christian: For reals?
Karl: Yes, but make sure you don’t get any on your dress.
Christian: What?
Karl: Never mind, just eat them.
Christian and Karl also went to the Diamondbacks vs. Dodgers game on Saturday night. This year we have tickets on the suite level in the All-You-Can-Eat suites. The suite level is very nice. The final score last night was Dodgers: 11, Diamondbacks: 2, Karl 14 hot dogs, 1 bag of peanuts, 8 bottles of water, Christian: 6 hot dogs, 2 bags of peanuts, 1 bag of potato chips, 1 box of popcorn, 2 bottles of water and 4 sodas. It is good to be back at Chase Stadium, it is a great place and it is exciting to be back in baseball season again.
Christian has started spending Friday night frequently at his friend Blake’s. Blake and Christian have been friends for some time and although there was some changing of the guard over the past couple years, Blake seems to have settled in as Christian’s best friend. Blake is a good kid. When Christian spends the night, the two boys tend to stay up all night and Christian’s idea of making sure he is back in the morning to do his Saturday yard work usually works out to be about 3 p.m. the next day but has been as late as 7 pm.
Sooooo Shelby
It has been a few weeks, but Shelby tried out and made Varsity Poms. Try outs went on for three days. Even though Shelby was sick and had to stay home from school, she still went to try outs. She even threw up at try outs. Her dedication and perseverance paid off however as Shelby is one of only a few freshmen that made the Varsity Team.
All Alyssa
Alyssa had her 16th Birthday Party this week even though her birthday is not until next week. She and 25 of her closest girl friends rented out a roller skating rink and all dressed up in 80’s outfits and played 80’s music loud all night. Alyssa’s 80’s get up was a poofy pink dress with her hair teased and pulled to the side. She said she had a lot of fun.
Family Stories
The Easter Bunny Peed at Our House
Caution:
This story is not for young children. DO NOT read this story if:
You are under the age of 12.
You still have some of your baby teeth.
You received money from the Tooth Fairy in the last year.
You mailed your Christmas list to Santa last year.
You could not wait for the Easter Bunny to come last night.
When Alyssa was little she used to come to Arizona for her Easter break from school every year. In California the schools have the week off school before Easter. The break was and still is connected to Easter. Of course in our Godless country you can no longer call it Easter break anymore.
When Alyssa was about 5 years old, Karl was living in a very small studio apartment. The apartment was so small that Alyssa used to be fascinated by the fact that the kitchen, bedroom and bathroom were all basically the same room. Not to mention the fact that it had a Murphy bed. For those of you who don’t know what a Murphy bed is; it is a bed that folds up into the wall and you pull it down when you want to sleep on it. Alyssa used tell random people, “Did you know that my Dad’s house is so little that bla bla bla.” She thought it was amazing.
In a very small studio apartment it is very hard to get Easter morning ready the night before when you have a bright-eyed 5 year old girl never more than 4 paces away. Karl had to wake up early on Easter morning while Alyssa was still sleeping and put her basket together and hide all the eggs in the dark being careful to stay very quiet.
Well when you get up after a night’s sleep the first thing most people want to do is pee. After hiding a few Easter eggs in the tiny apartment Karl had to pee. Now there was a door that separated the bathroom from the rest of the apartment, but the toilet was very loud when it flushed. Rather than risk Alyssa waking up in the middle of Easter preparations, Karl opted to sit down to pee so as to be as quiet as possible. Karl also did not flush the toilet.
The next morning Ayssa woke up to her Easter surprises and eventually made her way to the bathroom. She came running out from the bathroom with this excited exclamation, “Daddy, Daddy, the Easter Bunny peed in our toilet and forgot to flush the toilet.” For several years after that Alyssa would tell people all about how the Easter Bunny had peed at our house like it was some kind of special privilege or something.
